Once in our lifetime there comes a conversation where a person is saying “YES”, but your gut feeling is telling you that he wants to say “NO”. That gut feeling is the silent language we speak that is the core of communication. Because it carries 70% of the conversation and the rest are the words we speak. How you stand, gestures, eye contact gives off what you are feeling and the state you are in because actions speak louder than words. Now we are going to get into that space and explore that often overlooked silent language body language the non-verbal communication let’s dive in.
The Power of Posture and Stance
Posture and stance are the first that gets noticed from a mile away how you stand often represents your current state and how you feel. It’s the foundation of the non-verbal communication. Let’s think of it as open and closed.
- Open posture: it involves keeping your body and posture open so that the other person feels welcomed and easy to converse with. Make sure your arms and legs are uncrossed and you are facing the person you’re talking to. An open posture indicates confidence,honesty and a willingness to engage. It says “i’m here, i’m listening and i have nothing to hide”
- Closed posture: it is opposite crossing arms and legs, slouching or physically turning away from someone creates a barrier which is problematic. If you’re in a conversation and you cross your arms and legs or physically turn away from the person it indicates that you’re not in the mood to have a convo right now.
Making Eye Contact (But Not Too Much)
As they say “eyes are the gateway to the soul” they say it for a good reason. Effective eye contact surely is one of the best ways to build trust and it indicates that you are engaged and paying attention. It conveys interest and sincerity.
But there is a fine line between looking and staring. When you firmly make eye contact it shows generosity and empathy but when you hold eye contact for too long it makes you look intimidating and engages in fights. The best way to counter this is the rule of 50/70 making eye contact 50% when talking and 70% when listening. It shows that you are active in the conversation.
Gestures: Speaking with Your Hands
Hand gestures add weight and meaning to your words. When used correctly it makes you look confident and charismatic. hand gestures are helpful in building rapport. it is one of the most important part of body language
- Open palms: Showing your palm is a gesture of honesty and openness, going back in time people often use this to let the people know that you’re not holding a weapon and mean no harm.
- Steepling finger: in this gesture the hands get together and fingertips touch making a triangular shape resembling a church steeple. This conveys confidence, authority or deep thought.
- Pointing: Be careful with this one! Because pointing at someone with your index finger comes out as aggressive or accusatory. The better option is to use an open hand gesture. Always remember that it varies culture to culture so be mindful about it.
Facial Expressions: The Universal Language of non-verbal communication
While some gestures vary culturally, facial expressions such as anger, hatred, happiness, sadness, surprise and fear are mostly universal and recognized around the world. Smile is the most genuine and powerful tool in your non-verbal toolkit. It’s disarming, builds rapport, and makes you seem more approachable.
If you want your conversation to feel more authentic and sound promising you should pay attention to your words and facial expressions. If you say “I’m very excited” with a straight face with no expressions it would convey that you’re lying. Pay attention to your face and what you are saying. The face usually tells the real story.
Conclusion
The non-verbal is not just an add-on it is the silent language that goes unnoticed and ignored. But it could be the greatest weapon if used correctly. It’s basically a cheat code for life that will help you out in ways that you couldn’t have thought of. our body gives of how we feel form inside which is it is very important to learn body language so that we can read and use this as a skill in the real life and make our life easy.